Rules or Guides

Whatever your opinion, and no matter the topic, the moment that you lose sight of the fact that the group you are discussing is a collection of individual humans is the moment you are in the wrong.

The moment that your arguments about the adjective become so hyper-focused that you lose sight of the noun, your position becomes irrelevant in a moral sense.

Trans people are individual people. Don’t stop reading. If you’re so sure of your position then this post is no threat to it.

They are not dangerous or innocent. They are a broad group of people that span the full range of what people can be.

Further, for women in particular, the more that you focus on the physical “permissions” for trans people – whether that’s bathrooms or surgeries or attire – the more you fall into the very patriarchal thinking that you claim to be fighting against.

Your power is in your intuition – incidentally the first thing to go when you strip the humanity from the subject you are engaging with.

To focus more on the generalized acceptable interactions is to deny your own ability to respond according to the actual energy exchange in said interactions.

For instance, if you see a trans entering a bathroom and immediately respond based on whether you think that’s okay, you smother all intuitive nudges that would have guided you to an appropriate and singular response to that particular human in that particular moment.

And the appropriate response may very well have been wariness, or it could have been compassion, or simple friendliness, or nothing at all.

That one human holds as many potential expressions and moral leanings as any other.

But by leaning so heavily into your patriarchal structure, you silenced the matriarchal communion that would have allowed for nuance and subtleties.

And in that, you run the risk of inflicting further damage on a human who was already as morally guided as you aspire to be – thus making you the villain.

If you want to fight patriarchy as you claim, then stop thinking generalized structure and start feeling truth in each individualized encounter.

I said what I said.

©️2026 Cristen Writes